Monday, 8 February 2010

Tread Softly...


Sometimes...when we wander through life on our journey of discovery...
We forget the simple things...
Like sticking out your tongue to catch a snowflake...
Or holding out your hand to catch a raindrop...
The pleasure of feeling the sun on our faces...as we close our eyes and turn our face to the bright heat.

We seem to wander around searching...trying to find answers to things that, sometimes, there is no answer for.

I was going to post about the journey into faeryland...that glimpse through the veil that some of us are lucky enough to find.

I wanted to take you with me, down this secret path into their home...

But I can't...

For anyone feeling low or upset at the moment...please take my gift from the Fae and read no further...this is not such a happy post...
For anyone else who becomes deeply saddened by death then please don't read on...it is not my intent to upset you.

But this needs to be said.

A while ago I wrote a post about "The Not So Merry Widow"...in it I spoke of a cousin of ours who became mentally ill because of the abuse from his Grandfather.

Whilst I was painting this picture, I found out that this poor man has hung himself.
And that his younger brother has attempted suicide three times.

I have no proof that any of this is due to the way these men were treated as young boys...but I know in my heart that it must have played a part.
If this Grandparent treated me in such a way, in just the brief visits to his house...then what must he have done to two young boys who were left in his care all day while the parents worked?
I know that he would follow them to the outside toilet...every time...I know that the eldest boy was deeply troubled...I know that his Grandfather abused him.
I also know that this Grandfather was never brought to account for his actions.

So instead of my faery painting being a beautiful visit to the Fae...it became a sad look back for me...
I am sad for what has happened and I am angry for the wrongs that were never punished.
I am sad that...even now...this Grandfather haunts my life.
I am sad that I have brought him into your lives...you do not deserve that.
But most of all I am sad for these poor young men who had no one to turn to.

My mother's brother died of cancer some years ago...he had three children...his eldest daughter who adored him with the most outstanding love, had a break down...she has not yet recovered.
His only son was so grief stricken, that one fine day...he lay down on a railway track and was decapitated.
He was just eighteen years old.
He also felt he had no one to turn to...just before he killed himself he said that, " he wanted to be rocked in his father's arms once more"...
I hope that he is...

So...for these poor young men...
I dedicate my Faery...
I began her as a gentle reminder to always look down into the grass...
To keep an eye out for the small things beneath our feet...
To tread softly...

Now...she is guiding the forgotten children to a better place...
To the warmth of the sun...and a gentle people...
To a place of dreams...and not nightmares...

Where all children are safe...









5 comments:

Mother's Moon's Message said...

Oh Cee.. this is the most moving... Such tenderness and love you have inside of yourself although you play a good game at trying to show how tough you are... It is hard enough when ones life is sprinkled with hardship and sorrow... let alone when it is drenched in it... I count myself so truly blessed to have found your friendship. Your picture is fitting to your cousins... and I am sure they acknowlege it. It is beautiful and honestly maybe this was how it was meant to be... As it hold a much more deeper meaning now. No not light and airey tripping off into the land of Fae, yet a somber walk leading those whose lives were filled with sorrow to a place where light will now be their friend and times will be much better.... love you dear...

Bear cabin miniatures said...

I have left a sunshine award on my blog for you
Hugs, Julia xx

Julie Kendall said...

I came to leave you a little thing for being creative and i wish i now had something for strength, love and courage...all of which you have.
.....If you would like ...i have left a little something for you on my page
Julie
x

Witchy Mom's Homeschool said...

So beautiful, thoughtful and riddled with imagery.

Crystalrainbow said...

Ive nominated you for a little sunshine :)http://crystalrainbow-sparkleandshine.blogspot.com/2010/03/sunshine-award.html